As human beings, it is a beautiful thing when we can be open and giving, accessible to others. It enriches us and our relationships. But it is also important to have personal boundaries, a space that is entirely our own. Boundaries give form to relationships, and when they are crossed, whether intentionally or not, whether maliciously or not, it is an issue that needs to be addressed.
Many people find that anger is the most challenging emotion to deal with. But honoring your anger and expressing it appropriately, is good for your mental health. Anger is a healthy response to being hurt, betrayed, or lied to, and giving free expression to your anger can often save a relationship.
Allowing others to cross your personal boundaries, is often how people circumvent feeling angry because it is uncomfortable and sometimes risky. But if respect and self-respect are essential ingredients in healthy relationships, it is better to be courageous with your feelings, to say how you feel to the other. By doing so you honor both of you, you clear the air rather than stuffing your emotions inside only to be awakened at perhaps an inappropriate time in the future. Festering anger can only do damage – mostly to you.
So keep your personal boundaries strong, and set limits for others. And if someone you know – someone close or not – crosses your boundary, let him or her know. If it makes you angry, say so. It won’t kill you or make you a bad person. It will free you both.