To me, there is never any one TRUE way of getting anywhere. I don’t believe in any one true path or any superior form of spiritual connection or evolution. My spirituality is crafted everyday from a multitude of texts, authors, teachers, and life lessons I’ve discovered along the way. I believe there are many roads to spiritual progression and healing, and sometimes we take a few different roads at different points in life.
One road to healing I do believe in, is Brutal Honesty with oneself. Like many of the darker aspects of spiritual practices, such as shadow work (facing and connecting with the things about ourselves we don’t like or want to change and grow from), brutal honesty is not something everyone is ready for. Its purpose is not to give you the opportunity to bash yourself or roll around in guilt over the less desired aspects of yourself. Its purpose, like all spiritual work is to illuminate that which has been lying in the darkness unattended and ignored; but slowly eats away at your joy as a moth would slowly destroy a wool sweater.
If you know that you have cultivated enough self-love, and feel secure in your ability to see yourself for who you truly are at any given time, then brutal honesty is a worthwhile path. It simply means, stop lying to yourself about the “whys” of your life. Why you just said that, why you get angry when he says that, why you strike out for no reason, why you cry in the dark, and smile in the light. The path of brutal honesty with oneself confronts you on the stories you tell yourself, the stories you make up in your mind, the stories you keep adding paragraphs to.
“Keep it simple, stupid” is a common phrase, but I’d like to say, in this case, “keep it simply spiritual”. Don’t over complicate what happens to you, or what is said to you, or what you say to yourself. If someone has “wronged” you in some way, just know that you feel “wronged”. Don’t add to the story by saying, everyone always does this to you. People are always lying. No one is grateful for all the things you do…etc., because those statements cannot be true. What would be more true, is that a particular person has “wronged” you, or a particular person does not appreciate you. What could also be more true is that for some reason, you always feel wronged or unappreciated, because you don’t appreciate yourself and you don’t know how to be kind to yourself. Our world around us is only a reflection of our world within. For I know for a fact, that if you love yourself unconditionally, it really doesn’t ever matter what anyone thinks or feels about you. And you will also only allow those in your life who do appreciate you and whom you can appreciate. Dig?
Brutal honesty means becoming aware enough to catch yourself in your own lies. As a personal example; I would always say that people are not trustworthy. But the truth is, that I spent many years only allowing people to know a shadow of who I really was, and I kept the most important parts of myself in hiding. Therefore, I could only assume that others were doing the same, that I couldn’t truly know anyone. And in fact, I brought into my experience just that! People who only gave me a shadow of themselves, which meant I couldn’t trust them. Remember, the outside world reflects the inner truth. Amen?
So I simply offer to you another effective way to get to the heart of your matter. Only you know if you are ready to break on through to the other side, or not. It requires a great deal of self-love and self-awareness to stop telling lies and stories about you and your situation. It’s not easy to just tell it like it is. But let’s just take “easy” out of our mindsets and spiritual vocabularies. It doesn’t really mean anything and is a requirement for nothing that is worthwhile.