This is a question so often pondered by many people throughout their lives. It seems that we take one step, then something throws us three steps backwards. We get great ideas, and then life tosses us a curve ball, like divorce, loss of a job, or we become ill and cannot do the things we want to do. Children need us, spouses and partners need us, the job needs us. But we so badly want to create a change, a change we have wanted for a very long time. What do we do?
When you are in a space where you feel that the whole world is against you, it can be a terrifying and overwhelming feeling that often causes us to feel stuck in quicksand. I have been there more than once.When life gets that heavy, the first thing you can do is breathe, literally, begin to learn how to exhale, not just in theory, but in actual physical long deep breaths and complete exhales. Try it for just a few seconds a day. That’s all it takes to begin to calm down, and this exercise that literally begins with just a few seconds a day, allows you to give yourself something that only YOU can choose to give yourself. It is your decision only. Every tiny bit of power, attracts another experience of personal power.
Why these breathing exercises? Because physically, you will be unable to see your situation clearly and open up the space for resolution, when your heart is always racing. You need to find a way to bring some peace into your world, if but only for a few seconds a day so that your mind and spirit can begin to energize themselves. In the still of just a few seconds a day, you will create the space and opportunity for thoughts to arise about your situation that you would have never been able to imagine in a frantic state.
As these thoughts and ideas arise, write them down, type them on your computer, record them on a voice recorder, whatever process brings you the least resistance. Take note of the real issue, the real problem. Not all the junk that can attach itself to a problem. Then write down what comes to you in these still moments. And ask yourself, “what is the real truth here?”
Is the world, the whole entire world, really against you? No, that is our ego’s way of dealing with the changes and desires we are choosing to make that seem so different and far off from the world in which we are living now. So the world being against you, is not a truth. It cannot be the truth, because YOU are the world.
As you begin to see what is real and what is not real, it opens up a pathway for you to begin to explore other lies you’ve been repeatedly telling yourself, until you have made them the truth. Now, some things will be true…”I don’t have any money.” This may be a real true statement and fact of your reality at this time. So, how can you begin to realize your dream without any money?
Don’t stop breathing…that will only kill you, it will not bring you any money. So keep finding those still spaces. I find them shoveling horse poop and helping to keep things clean here on the ranch. I don’t meditate. I find my still spaces in creating or doing something that may seem mundane, but I know it needs to be done. So find your own way…but find it.
How can I make more money to begin this project? To move to a new state? To buy a new home, to spend a year in Europe, to pay off my debt? And then listen. The problems did not arise overnight, they most likely will not disappear overnight.
Is it possible for me to move forward with less money that I’ve imagined? A real question that has many real answers, so ask it. And then listen.
Many times, any action I take towards my goal, is enough for me to feel better about where I am. Also, on a metaphysical level, any action you take moves the energies and gets things stirring in the universe. Your problem, dilemma, issues, may actually not be resolved with these particular actions. Sometimes action is about, once again, giving you your power back, not necessarily being the panacea to your ills. So if you feel like taking an inspired action, just do it. You don’t know what the outcome will be, unless you try.
Once while I was living in Florida, I was on the very verge of being without a home. I had no family there, and really, no authentic friends. I was renting a place that was entirely too expensive and had drained very penny I had saved bartending that year. And I ended up in that place because a friend who called me her sister, was renting a portion of a condo to me which I could afford, but decided that she just did’nt want me there anymore. On the last day of my needing to be out of this very expensive rental, I had absolutely no money, and nowhere to go, with my cat Meme in tow. I was hurt, damaged, and afraid. But still on this day, I sat still on the sofa with my bags packed and no car to put them in. A voice said, call Emily. She was a professor I met while bartending and doing some marketing work for a hookah lounge about a year before. I had after so many months, run into her in the market one day, while living in this place I could not afford. We had exchanged numbers that day, and so on this day I called her, and was honest and told her my situation. I had nothing to give, but myself, but when I could give, I would. She didn’t hesitate, she said, “come”.
Her housemate and best friend for many years, was guess who? Andie…yes my iWonder Sister and best friend in the whole wide world. I was there for a year, with many things happening in all of our lives and Andie and I bonded in a way I have never bonded with anyone. And now, another year later, we live together on a gorgeous ranch in New Mexico with our pets, 26 horses and a beautiful family next door as our landlords and friends. We write and coach for a living. We keep trying new things and we are only at the beginning of this new life adventure.
I told you this story to let you know where I’ve been and how it all works. If you are feeling stuck or like an outcast of the world because of your situation, Ask the iWonder Sisters is free. Send us your email at email@example.com or visit our Ask the iWonder Sisters page on this site and fill out the form. Completely confidential and judgement free…how about that?
See..the world is not against you, because we are FOR you!
Much love and gratitude,